WHEN WORDS STING

Red ant closeup - “An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox.”

A funny story tells of a hostess making final arrangements for an elaborate reception. "Nora," she said to her veteran servant, "for the first half-hour I want you to stand at the drawing room door and call the guests' names as they arrive."

Nora's face lit up. "Thank you, ma'am," she replied. "I've been wanting to do that to some of your friends for the last twenty years."

Maybe we can relate, but either manners or fear of losing a job kept us from saying what we felt at the time. Often better to do as Napoleon Hill suggests: "If you must slander someone, don't speak it - but write it - write it in the sand, near the waters edge!"

Criticism is not to be confused with evaluation. We would do well to have our performance evaluated from time to time. None of us is beyond improvement. But hurtful and self-serving criticism, often spoken out of anger or vindictiveness, creates irreparable damage in a relationship. From time to time, we each feel its sting.

Phillips Brooks, over a century ago, used to pray for the grace to both rise above criticisms as well as to resist firing them back. "Oh, God," he prayed, "give the strength to live another day. Keep me from losing faith in people. Keep me sweet and sound, in spite of occasional ingratitude and meanness. Above all, keep me from giving little stings, and minding them."

A good antidote when words sting.

From Lifesupport.