Tuesday, December 30, 2008

EMBARRASSING MOMENTS IN LIFE

Raindeer ride at the amusement park - “Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can't ride you unless your back is bent.”

You've had one of those embarrassing moments. One of mine occurred a few years ago.

I was driving through a seedy side of town one day and spotted a young woman hitching a ride. (I honestly believed she just wanted a ride!) So I stopped the car to let her in.

It happened during rush hour heavy traffic. I pulled over, but not out of the lane, for there was no shoulder on the road. As I reached across to open the car door, I noticed traffic backing up behind me. (It also seemed that more than a few drivers were glaring at me.)

Once she was in and we started down the street I asked her, "Where are you going?" She mumbled something I didn't understand so I asked her again.

Instead of answering, she turned to me and asked, "Do you want a date?

In my normal eloquent manner I responded, "Huh?"

"Do you want a date?" she asked again. "Do you want to have some fun?"

I may not be the fastest horse in the race, but it was finally getting through. "No," I feebly answered, realizing now what I had stepped into. (Believe me - she didn't LOOK like a prostitute!)

"Then you better let me out," she said. "I have work to do."

We had only traveled about two blocks and I pulled over again. The SAME CARS that were behind me before were still there. Again, they all had to stop while she got out of the car. Now I was SURE they were glaring.

As I drove off something unsettling occurred to me: I slowly realized that I was undoubtedly the only person on the street that day who didn't know what was going on!

Mayor Filorello LaGuardia of New York City said, "I don't make many mistakes, but when I do, it's a beaut." I, on the other hand, make plenty of mistakes, and a surprising number of them are beauts.

But I like actress Sophia Loren's approach: "Mistakes," she says, "are part of the dues one pays for a full life." And the fuller the life, I suspect, the more dues paid and the more risks taken.

I'll take the risks and make the mistakes if it means my life will be fuller. After all, the greater mistake would be to never to risk at all.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Sunday, December 28, 2008

TWO EYES; TWO HANDS FOR LIFE

Messy wire exchange point - “Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.”

An older couple lay in bed one morning, having just awakened from a good night's sleep. He tenderly took her hand, but she pulled back responding, "Don't touch me."

"Why not?" he asked.

"Because I'm dead."

Her confused husband said, "What are you talking about? We're both lying here in bed together and talking to one another."

"No," she said, "I'm definitely dead."

He insisted, "You're not dead. What in the world makes you think you're dead?"

"Because I woke up this morning and nothing hurts."

It is good to be able to laugh when we can, and especially about daily aches and pains or normal problems. But sometimes our difficulties and losses are so staggering we wonder how long we can cope. Lingering and chronic illness, loss of someone we love and overwhelming worry can devastate us. All of us have known almost unbearable pain and hardships. Heart-breaking times. We might think we will never again wake up feeling good.

A wise obstetrician at a university teaching hospital once made a comment about suffering. Someone asked the doctor what advice he offered to his students, future doctors and nurses, when caring for mothers who gave birth to stillborn infants.

The doctor paused for a moment in thought. Then he said this: "I tell them that they need two eyes. One eye is not enough; they need two eyes. With one eye they have to check the I.V.; and with the other eye they have to weep. That's what I tell them," he said. "I tell them that they need two eyes."

He knows the secret of hard times: we need two eyes. One for seeing, the other for weeping. And we need two hands. One for holding on, the other for reaching out.

I don't know all there is to know about suffering. But I do know the way to survive it. Two eyes; two hands. That's how we get through this life best.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Friday, December 26, 2008

THOSE WHO WILL LISTEN WILL LEARN IN LIFE

Employee punch card machine - “Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her: but once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game.”

Advice comes in all shapes and sizes. For instance, someone gave the sage advice: "If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead." No argument here.

Or this, found in a fortune cookie: "You are a poor, pathetic, gullible fool who seeks advice from bakery products."

Conrad Hilton, hotelier extraordinaire, was asked on national television if he had one vital bit of advice for listeners. "Please," he said, "place the curtain on the INSIDE of the tub."

It's been accurately said that there is a lot of advice available for nothing, and most of it is worth about what we paid for it. But here is sound guidance, from an unknown author, worth taking to heart:

"If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive; for that person has helped you learn about trust and the importance of caution.

If someone loves you, love back unconditionally; that one is teaching you to love.

Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience them again.

Talk to people that you have never talked to before -- and actually listen.

Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high.

Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you.

You can make of your life anything you wish. Create your own life and then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.

Most importantly, if you love others, tell them, for you never know what may come tomorrow.

And learn a lesson in life each day you live."

Even some free advice can occasionally be of profit. Those who listen will learn.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

HOW TO STAY IN LOVE FOR LIFE

By the pool side - “Worlds can be found by a child and an adult bending down and looking together under the grass stems or at the skittering crabs in a tidal pool.”

After careful consideration and endless debate The Perfect Man has finally been named: "Mr. Potato Head." He's tan. He's cute. He knows the importance of accessorizing. And if he looks at another girl, you can rearrange his face.

Jean Kerr quipped, "Personally, I think if a woman hasn't met the right man by the time she's 24, she may be lucky." We become cynical about love, don't we? We're tempted to believe that real love is a myth, a long-term relationship is a marathon and romance is for kids.

One person said, "Marriage changes passion...suddenly you're in bed with a relative." But does marriage have to kill romance? Is marriage really nothing but a long banquet at which the dessert is served first?

I believe in love and romance. I believe it is something that can last forever, if it is carefully cultivated. Here are some tips for keeping romance alive and for staying in love:

FIND time to date. Time to be alone and tell each other of your love. You spent time alone at first...why did you quit? My wife and I get away alone every week. Just to refocus on each other. And to fall in love again.

UNDERSTAND what delights the other and make it happen. "The romance is over," says Marlys Huffman, "when you see a rosebush and start looking for aphids instead of picking a bouquet." Does she like to be surprised by flowers? Does he have a favorite dish or activity? Does she enjoy spontaneous affection? Know what brings pleasure to your partner -- and delight him/her!

NEVER forget why you got together in the first place. When you focus first on his faults you're not thinking about his strengths. When you're busy pointing out her imperfections, you're not enjoying those qualities that attracted you to her initially. Choose to appreciate that which first drew you together and your romance will grow.

The first letter of these three tips spells the word FUN. Have fun together. Laugh. Go on outings. Plan time to enjoy one another. Remember, "the family the PLAYS together also STAYS together"!

A woman from Charleston, South Carolina was overheard to remark that it was her 53rd wedding anniversary. When asked if she planned a special celebration, she smiled and said softly, "When you have a nice man, it really doesn't matter." I suspect they learned the secrets of staying in love.

Just in case you're not presently with Mr. or Miss Exactly Right, there ARE some things you can do to bring romance back into your life. And though your relationship may never be perfect, it CAN be perfectly wonderful.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Monday, December 22, 2008

WHAT ARE YOU FILLED WITH IN LIFE?

Fresh water melons for sale - “I watch out my window as the planes take off into space. Oh, that I could fly away and start fresh. But I must realize that fresh starts also come in the pretty wrapped gift called 'tomorrow.'”

I recall reading that a man from Virginia Beach filed a law suit against his hospital. He opted to have surgery in order to lose weight. So he had his stomach stapled -- a procedure that reduced the size of his stomach so he couldn't eat as much.

A couple of days after surgery he sneaked down the hospital corridors to the kitchen. There he raided the refrigerator and ate so much that his staples burst.

The law suit? He claimed it was all the hospital's fault. They should have locked the refrigerator. No, I don't know how the suit came out...just the staples.

If the first sin was eating the forbidden fruit, then the second was trying to excuse it. "It's not my fault! SHE made me do it!"

Wonderful things can happen when we decide to be responsible for everything we put into mouths, everything we put into our minds and everything we put into our hearts.

Fill your body with the right foods and it will perform well.

Fill your mind with learning and it will not stagnate.

Fill your mind with optimistic attitudes and you will always have hope.

Fill your heart with courage and you will be able to face life with confidence.

Fill your heart with love and you'll never be alone.

Fill every day will plenty of gratitude and you will always be happy.

Only you can decide how to fill up your life.

Albert Ellis has said, "The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize
that you control your own destiny."

Only you can choose what goes into your life. Fill up your mind, your body and your heart with the very best, and the result can be no less than magnificent.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Saturday, December 20, 2008

ARE YOU RENEWING YOUR DREAMS FOR LIFE?

Furry cat in a cage - “Never feel self-pity, the most destructive emotion there is. How awful to be caught up in the terrible squirrel cage of self.”

"Grandpa," a young girl asked, "were you in the ark with Noah?"

"Certainly not, my dear," Grandpa replied in astonishment.

"Then," the puzzled child continued, "why weren't you drowned?"

Maybe he seemed older than Noah to her, but seniors may be finally getting respect they rightfully deserve. Hugh Downs reported that when senior adults are properly motivated, their intelligence does not wane. In fact, the ability to organize thinking may increase as folks age. Many people in their 50's, 60's and even 70's can go through college with greater efficiency than at 18.

Adults over 70 years of age have contributed richly and in varied ways.

- Emmanuel Kant wrote his finest philosophical works at age 74.
- Verdi at 80 produced "Falstaff" and at 85, "Ave Maria."
- Goethe was 80 when he completed "Faust."
- Tennyson was 80 when he wrote "Crossing the Bar."
- Michelangelo completed his greatest work at 87.
- At 90, Justice Holmes was still writing brilliant American Supreme Court opinions.

And then there's George Dawson. George learned to read at age 98. (He was forced to quit school when he was a small child in order to help support his family.) "I got tired of writing my name with an 'X,'" he said. Four years later, at age 102, he wrote his autobiography, LIFE IS SO GOOD (2001, Penguin Group).

Dreams are renewable. They need not expire like an over-due library book. No matter our age, we can breathe new life into old dreams. I believe that the best age is the age you are, but something even better awaits just ahead for those with the courage to dream and to act.

Are you renewing your dreams?

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Thursday, December 18, 2008

JUST DO SOMETHING IN LIFE

Fresh squid from the sea - “Objects which are usually the motives of our travels by land and by sea are often overlooked and neglected if they lie under our eye. We put off from time to time going and seeing what we know we have an opportunity of seeing when we please.”

I once stopped behind several cars in an intersection. The winter weather was icy cold and a strong artic wind blew relentlessly. Ahead of me a young woman stood alongside the street rubbing her bare hands together and dancing in place to keep warm. Beside her rested a sign that read, "I have a baby and no food." She was obviously crying, likely from the pain of the cold wind.

Homeless and unemployed people are a common sight in many of our larger cities, and most motorists drive by without offering assistance. They have no doubt been taught that giving money fosters a dependent lifestyle, or the ready cash may be used to purchase alcohol or another substance rather than the food it was intended for. Like me, they may have been taught that one should give to a local charity or through one's church, as these institutions can help those in need far more effectively.

This, of course, is true, but I am reminded of the college students who encountered a homeless man on the sidewalk. One of the students took a couple of dollars from his wallet and handed it to the unfortunate stranger. His friend commented, "Why did you do that? He's just going to spend it on booze or drugs." The student answered, "Yeah...like we're not!"

As I waited for the light to turn, I felt conflicted about that young woman. Whether or not I should give money, she was obviously in need. And whether or not she actually had a baby really didn't seem to matter. I gave up guessing people's motives and analyzing their stories long ago. It was cold. She was cold. And she obviously felt she had to be there.

What should I do? Give her money? What was best?

As I wrestled with these questions, the window rolled down from the car in front of me and a hand shot out holding a warm pair of gloves. The driver took her own gloves off and gave them to the shivering woman. I saw the young woman mouth the words "Thank you" as a broad smile lit up her face.

As I debated, somebody else helped. As I hesitated, somebody else acted. As I tried to decide the BEST way to assist, somebody else just did what she could. As I did nothing, she did something.

I made myself a pledge that day to always do SOMETHING. Whether it is big or small, just do something. Something is almost always better than nothing!

Educator Leo Buscaglia said, "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." Don't underestimate what you CAN do! Each of us can do something, and the something you do may be more important than you'll ever know.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A CHANGE OF PACE IN LIFE

Tree barks on display - “You expected to be sad in the fall. Part of you dies each year when the leaves fell from the trees and their branches were bare against the wind and the cold, wintry light. But you knew there would always be the spring, as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen. When the cold rains kept on and killed the spring, it was as though a young person had died for no reason.”

According to a Greek legend, in ancient Athens a man noticed the great storyteller Aesop playing childish games with some little boys. He laughed and jeered at Aesop, asking him why he wasted his time in such frivolous activity.

Aesop responded by picking up a bow, loosening its string, and placing it on the ground. Then he said to the critical Athenian, "Now, answer the riddle, if you can. Tell us what the unstrung bow implies."

The man looked at it for several moments but had no idea what point Aesop was trying to make. The moralist explained, "If you keep a bow always bent, it will break eventually; but if you let it go slack, it will be more fit for use when you want it."

So it is with us. Our minds and bodies are like the bow. When constantly under pressures of everyday life, we can eventually break. We need to loosen up; we need time to take the pressure
off and relax.

Former baseball pitcher Dutch Leonard might have put it a little differently. He once said that the secret of great pitching is not speed or the ability to throw curves. It's the "change of pace." The average batter will soon learn to hit a pitcher who continually throws the same kind of pitch. But it's hard to hit against a pitcher who changes the pace of delivery. That change of pace gives a pitcher the edge over the best of batters.

A change of pace likewise gives us an edge in life. Taking time to watch the clouds, enjoy a breeze, take a walk, read or just slow down is necessary if we are to be our best later. And a regular day of rest is as important as regular sleep. It's a way of taking the pressure off.

To be your best, make sure you change your pace. It may just be the change you need.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Sunday, December 14, 2008

WORK IT OUT FOR LIFE

Waiting at the clinic - “You've spent your whole life running and running, trying to catch up with something that has never been there for you. And all you've done is go farther and farther away from the precious love that's been waiting for you all the time.”

"Anger blows out the lamp of the mind," said Robert Ingersoll.

It may be true! I heard a story about one woman who seemed to have no reason behind her anger. The story goes like this:

A man read, in the want ads, of a sports car for sale. It had only 3,000 miles. "Like new," the ad boasted. "Mint condition. $75.00."

He laughed to himself, and he said, "There goes the newspaper, making another mistake." But he decided to call the number anyway and he asked the woman who answered about the car.

"Is it really brand new?"

"Yes," she replied.

"Three thousand miles?"

"Yes."

"The price?"

"Seventy-five dollars," she answered.

"Lady, what's wrong with it?" he asked.

"Nothing is wrong with it. You're the first to call. I supposed nobody else believes the ad."

He decided to look at it. She let him take a test drive. The car looked exquisite and ran perfectly. He just couldn't believe his luck!

"The car is yours for $75.00," the woman said emphatically, "on one condition. I want the money now and I want you to drive it away so I never have to see it again."

He paid her and took the keys. "Please tell me, lady," he persisted. "You could have sold this car for thirty thousand dollars. What is going on?"

She told her story: "I bought this car for my husband on our fortieth wedding anniversary. Two weeks later he ran off with somebody else. Last week I got a card from him. They are in a
resort in Miami Beach, Florida. The card said, 'Need money, sell car, send cash.' I did."

You may smile at her way of expressing anger. But what do you do when you are angry?

Some people "act it out." They break something. Or they say something they later regret. They strike back.

Other people "take it out." They kick the dog or scream at the kids. They lash out at the next unlucky person they come across.

Still others "talk it out." They find someone who will listen. They know they have to bring it up if they want to get it out. And after they've talked it out they usually know what to do and generally feel better.

ACT IT OUT and your actions will become a block to good communication.

TAKE IT OUT and you cause more hurt and anger.

TALK IT OUT and you can GET IT OUT.

Once you GET IT OUT you can WORK IT OUT and your relationship will work for you!

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Friday, December 12, 2008

A TEMPERATE RESPONSE

Nutritious food for lunch - “Learning acquired in youth arrests the evil of old age; and if you understand that old age has wisdom for its food, you will so conduct yourself in youth that your old age will not lack for nourishment.”

A young girl came into the house with a tear in her pants. Her mother was exasperated, as this had happened too many times before. At her wits end, she said to her daughter, "Now you go into your room, take off those pants, and sew up that tear!" The poor child had never held a needle in her life!

A little while later her mother saw the pants crumpled on the floor of her daughter's bedroom -- still torn. She looked around and...no little girl. Spying the basement light on, she called down the
stairs, "Are you down there running around with your pants off?"

A big voice boomed up, "No ma'am. I'm reading the gas meter."

Thomas Jefferson once advised, "When angry, count to ten before you speak; if very angry, count to 100."

Another way to say it is like this: When angry, slow down. Slow down and think. Slow down and calm down. A later response will be a more tempered response and usually a better one. Slow down and get some distance from the provoking incident. You'll see it more for what it is, and you'll often see that it never deserved your ire. Slow down and consider your best response.

On the other hand, don't forever hold it in. For anger does more damage to the vessel in which it is stored than the object on which it is poured. Uncontrolled rage will mostly hurt you. Slow down before you let it out. But after you let it out, be sure to let it go.

And when you express your anger, keep your temper -- no one else wants it. Untold relationships, otherwise beautiful and full of promise, are ruined by rage. Countless careers and lives are brought down by harsh and thoughtless words.

Mahatma Gandhi had this motto on his wall at Sevagram:
"When you are in the right,
You can afford to keep your temper;
When you are in the wrong,
You can't afford to lose it."

Slow down -- and temper your anger with understanding.

Slow down -- and temper your ire with compassion.

Slow down -- and temper...your temper.

You'll be glad you did.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

KEEPING HOPE ALIVE

Transformers Galvatron toy model - “The mother is only really the mistress of her daughter upon the condition of continually representing herself to her as a model of wisdom and type of perfection”

We cannot live only on hope. But neither can we live without it. Nobody knew this better than John Chapman.

John Chapman was a man of great hope. He was born in 1774 in Massachusetts. In the early 1800's he got in on the opening of land in the Northwest Territory, as it was then called, of the new United States. He found small plots of land suitable for farming and cleared them by hand. He bought fruit seed in Pennsylvania every year and carried it to his many apple orchards, usually on his back.

When the trees were large enough to transplant, he sold them to settlers homesteading the West. Eventually, he had little apple orchards spread around what would become the states of Ohio, Michigan, Illinois and Indiana. Most people forgot, or never knew, his real name, and took to calling him Johnny the Apple Man or Johnny Appleseed.

Johnny was a gentle man with a big vision. He was liked by most people who knew him, the native Indians and white settlers alike. His vision was to spread the goodness of apple trees everywhere people settled. Apples, he believed, gave the promise of harvest and hope that the wilderness would become home. Every tree he grew was a symbol of hope.

Johnny had another curious habit. He loved books, but did not have the means to carry more than two, usually a Bible and a book of inspiration or theology. Because Johnny wanted to share his books, he carefully cut chapters out of whatever inspirational book he had available and loaned one or two chapters to families that wanted to read. He'd later swap those chapters for others when he came back through. In this way he left hope and encouragement wherever he traveled.

His grave can be found today in Fort Wayne, Indiana. It says, "Johnny Appleseed (John Chapman). He lived for others."

Johnny understood his greatest task in life: to keep hope alive. When we keep hope alive, then hope keeps us alive.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Monday, December 8, 2008

DEADLY ASSUMPTIONS

Restaurant table napkin fold - “We were a silent, hidden thought in the folds of oblivion, and we have become a voice that causes the heavens to tremble.”

Joan, the town gossip and supervisor of the town's morals recently accused George, a local man, of having a drinking problem because she observed his pickup truck outside the town's only bar one morning. George stared at her for a moment, and said nothing. Later that evening, he parked his pickup truck in front of her house and left it there all night.

Why is it that most assumptions are wrong? Yet we too often act as if they are right!

Years ago, a young American at a banquet found himself seated next to the eminent V. K. Wellington Koo, a Chinese diplomat. Completely at a loss as to what to say to someone from such a different culture, this young man ventured, "Likee soupee?"

Mr. Koo smiled and nodded. Later when called upon to speak, Wellington Koo delivered an eloquent talk in exquisite English, sat down while the applause was still resounding, turned to the young man and smiled, "Likee speechee?

His assumption about Mr. Koo was simply not true. Which is not unlike a husband who assumes he knows his wife's opinion on a matter, only to find out she thinks differently. Or a wife who assumes that her husband's silence means he is angry or disinterested, only to learn that he is worried about something else. Or an employee who assumes he knows that his boss is upset with him because she didn't praise his performance on a project, when she was merely preoccupied with another matter.

Assumptions. We all make them. They're usually wrong and they too often get us into trouble.

I like the advice of Eniong Hilario: "Things are better said than assumed." When in doubt, check it out. You think you know what was said? Check it out. You think you know what was meant? Check it out. You may think you know, but check it out.

And when you do, be prepared to be surprised!

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Saturday, December 6, 2008

LABOR OF LOVE

Long queue at the boarding gate - “La distance n'y fait rien; il n'y a que le premier pas qui coĆ»te. - Distance doesn't matter; it is only the first step that is difficult.”

Too many people think they have nothing to offer. The can't build a house, teach a math course, repair an automobile or paint a beautiful picture! They feel they are less valuable than others.

One man applied for a job as a handyman. The prospective employer asked, "Can you do carpentry?" The man answered in the negative.

"How about bricklaying? " Again the man answered, "No."

The employer asked, "Well, what about electrical work?"

The man said "No, I don't know anything about that, either."

Finally the employer said, "Well, tell me then what is handy about you?"

The man replied, "I live just around the corner."

His greatest ability was his availability. But beyond your availability, you may have more to offer than you think. For WHO you are is often more important than WHAT you do. Let me explain.

Millions of tourists have visited Taj Mahal in India. Some say that stepping through the vast sandstone gate is like immersing oneself in a photo. The Taj Mahal glistens in the light of dawn, glowing like a sculpted ember.

It was built by an emperor of India for his beloved wife, whom he called Taj Mahal. She died in childbirth, and as she departed, the story goes, she asked him to build her something beautiful and to visit the site each year on their anniversary and light a candle.

Millions of precious and semiprecious stones adorn the walls. Lapis, jade, quartz, amber, emeralds and onyx, among others, are set into the white marble. Marvelously detailed arrangements of these polished and shaped stones form garlands of flowers, both timeless and exquisite. One can only imagine gnarled fingers lifting blocks of white marble, shaping and polishing the blocks until they were as smooth as an infant's tummy.

The Taj Mahal was designed to reflect the different moods of the day, and as the sun rises, the mausoleum whitens, almost as though daylight were bleaching it. The white marble wondrously reflects the light around it, seemingly changing colors throughout the day.

Built as a labor of love, it is truly one of the great wonders of the world. Your life, too, can become a labor of love.

The Taj Mahal is made of many of earth's finest materials. Similarly, your life can also be built of the finest of qualities: character, commitment, devotion, integrity and honor.

The Taj Mahal is adorned with jewels. Likewise, your life can bear fruits of love, joy, peace, kindness, hope and more.

You may have more to offer than you realize. Perhaps what you generously give away is your own beautiful life. And that is the best gift of all.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Thursday, December 4, 2008

FORGET THE DUCK!

Makeshift cooking table - “There is one thing more exasperating than a spouse who can cook and won't, and that's a spouse who can't cook and will.”

Richard Hoefler, in his book WILL DAYLIGHT COME? (1979, C S S Publishing Company), tells about two young children visiting their grandparents for the summer. Johnny was given his first slingshot. He practiced shooting in the woods, but missed everything he aimed at.

As he returned to Grandma's back yard, however, he spied her pet duck. It wasn't the only duck she kept, but it was her favorite. On an impulse he took aim and let it fly. This time he didn't miss. His stone struck and killed the duck.

The boy panicked. He didn't mean to hurt the bird -- he was even sure he'd miss! But he had killed it. His panic grew to desperation and he hid the duck in the woodpile, only to look up and see his sister. Sally had seen it all, but she said nothing to her grandparents.

After lunch that day Grandma said, "Sally, let's wash the dishes." Sally said, "Johnny told me he wanted to help in the kitchen today. Didn't you Johnny?" She whispered to him, "Remember the duck." (Blackmailed by his sister!) So Johnny did the dishes.

Later Grandpa asked if the children wanted to go fishing. Grandma said, "I'm sorry, but I need Sally to help make supper." Sally smiled and said, "That's all taken care of, Johnny wants to do it." Again she whispered, "Remember the duck." Johnny stayed while Sally went fishing.

Johnny did both his chores and Sally's for several days, and could stand it no longer. He confessed to Grandma that he'd killed the duck.

She said, "I know Johnny." She gave him a big hug and added, "I was standing at the window and saw the whole thing. But because I love you, I forgave you. I just wondered how long you would let Sally make a slave of you."

His grandmother was more ready to forgive then he was even to ask for forgiveness. Similarly, we are surrounded by more grace than we may realize. But a disturbing inner voice often whispers, "Remember the duck. Remember the duck." Some people live their whole lives enslaved by the voice that says, "Remember the duck." They never let themselves be forgiven!

They don't know the meaning of deep peace. They are seldom free of guilt and feel as if happiness only comes to others more deserving.

What does it matter if the whole world were to love us, and accept us in spite of our failings, if we persist in feeling badly? Are you sick of feeling sick about the mistakes of your past?

Maybe it's time to forget the duck! After you've done all you can to rectify the past, then it's time to put it down. Forget the duck -- and be free.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

GOING FOR IT IN LIFE

Santa Claus mechanical decoration - “Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Clause. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who will?”

Columnist Dave Barry says this about his father: "My dad ... he'd try anything -- carpentry, electrical wiring, plumbing, roofing. From watching him, I learned a lesson that still applies to my
life today: No matter how difficult a task may seem, if you're not afraid to try it, you can do it. And when you're done, it will leak." (And then you'll pay somebody even more to fix it than if you'd called him in the first place.)

But I learned from my parents the value of "going for it." "Nothing ventured, nothing lost," is the motto of too many of us. Many people are so afraid to fail that they never venture beyond the familiar. "Better to be safe than sorry" has trapped too many unhappy people in the cocoon of their comfort zones.

A delightful story tells that Col. Robert Johnson of Salem, New Jersey, announced that he would take a public risk. He let the town know that he would eat a wolf peach on the steps of the county
courthouse at noon on September 26, 1820. "Why would he take such a chance?" asked bewildered townsfolk.

Scientists and doctors had long proclaimed the wolf peach, also called the Jerusalem Apple and the Love Apple, as poisonous. Col. Johnson was warned that he would foam and froth at the mouth. If the wolf peach was too ripe and warmed by the sun, they told him he would be exposing himself to brain fever. Should he somehow survive the experience, the skin of the fruit would stick to the lining of his stomach and eventually cause cancer.

A crowd of 2,000 friends and neighbors jammed the square to see Col. Johnson eat the "poisonous" fruit -- a tomato.

Col. Johnson believed his risk was small, but must be taken if myths about the fruit were to be dispelled. Who has not accomplished anything worthwhile without taking some chance?

"Behold the turtle," says James Conant. "He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out."

From Lifesupport.

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