Monday, February 21, 2011
DRIVING OUT BAD NAILS FOR LIFE
Tall orange building - “A man is not an orange. You can't eat the fruit and throw the peel away”
A teacher who was lecturing on habits told his class, "Anything you
repeat twenty times is yours forever." From the back of the classroom
came a whispered voice, "Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah…." Of course, what
the teacher was trying to say is that any behavior, often repeated,
becomes habit.
The Dutch scholar Desiderius Erasmus once said, "A nail is driven out
by another nail. Habit is overcome by habit." And if I understand him
right, he suggests that saying no to a bad habit is not enough.
Instead, we should try to replace it with a good one. Repeat the new
behavior twenty times … and it is yours.
If any behavior, good or bad, is often repeated, it becomes stronger
and more powerful. "Since habits become power, make them work for you
and not against you," said E. Stanley Jones. In other words, drive out
the undesirable nail, the behavior you'd like to change, with a better
one.
One woman did just that after lamenting to her friend, "I hate being
late. It has been a problem for me all of my life."
"Do you really want to change that habit?" her friend asked. The woman
said that she did and her friend responded, "All right. Every time you're
late for work or anywhere else, then give me $25."
"I'd go broke!" she said. "But I'll do $10."
"It's got to hurt," said the friend.
"Believe me, that will hurt," the woman replied. They agreed that the
money should be deposited in a jar and used for charity.
In the first week, the habitually tardy woman made a concerted effort
to plan ahead and she only paid $10 to her friend. The next week, $20.
The third week, none at all. By week five, she had built a strong
habit of leaving early, and her new behavior replaced the old pattern
of tardiness that had hindered her for so long. She drove out one nail
with another one. And she found freedom.
If you're like me, there is a bad nail you want to remove. Today is a
good day to pick up a better nail and start using it.
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