FILLED UP WITH LOVE FOR LIFE

Inside the airplane cabin - “If the book is good, is about something that you know, and is truly written, and reading it over you see that this is so, you can let the boys yip and the noise will have that pleasant sound coyotes make on a very cold night when they are out in the snow and you are in your own cabin that you have built or paid for with your work.”

Welsh poet David Whyte made the intriguing observation, "I don't want to have written on my tombstone, when finally people struggle through the weeds, pull back the moss, and read the inscription there, 'He made his car payments.'"

Whyte, like most of us, wants his life to matter. Even in some small way, most people want to make a difference and, at least to some degree, they want to be happy. But it doesn't just happen.

I am inspired by the story of Rose Nelson, told in Arnold and Barry Fox's book Making Miracles (Emmaus, PA: The Good Spirits Press, 1989). One can usually find a cheery smile on the face of the wheelchair-bound woman. Which is remarkable, given what happened. You see, Rose was brutally beaten by two drunk teenage boys who left her unable to walk. She was forced to sell her home after medical bills devoured her modest savings.

If anyone has reason to be resentful, it is Rose Nelson. But she will smile and say that she never even thinks of being bitter as long as her brain is working and she can think of love.

"How can you be so loving after what happened to you?" she was asked.

"Oh, my," she considered. "I could have dried up after the boys beat me. I was afraid I would. That's why I decided to be full of love and to give my love to everyone. The more I love everyone else, the better I feel. And the better I feel, the more I love the world. Love cured my fear."

Rose worked at love and happiness. It had to become a high priority if she was not to be consumed by her horrific experience. Yet anyone who wants peace or happiness or joy can learn from Rose. We must do more than just make the car payments. We must love and love and love some more. Rose learned to fill her mind with as much love as it would hold, and then gave it away at every opportunity.

Dr. Karl Menninger said this about love: "We do not fall in love, we grow in love and love grows in us." Let enough grow in you to fill you up and you'll be satisfied forever.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

A LOFTIER AMBITION FOR LIFE

Live crocodiles resting in the shade by the pond - “As there is no worse lie than a truth misunderstood by those who hear it, so reasonable arguments, challenges to magnanimity, and appeals to sympathy or justice, are folly when we are dealing with human crocodiles and boa-constrictors.”

One woman says she bought a computer to help her figure her budget. The first thing she learned was that she couldn't afford a computer.

Most people never feel as if they have enough money, and one of the greatest problems in too many lives is financial debt. Earl Wilson says, "Nowadays people can be divided into three classes - the Haves, the Have-Nots, and the Have-Not-Paid-For-What-They-Haves."

Yet, since the beginning of time, people have been preoccupied with ways to get or keep money. In fact, in The Old Farmer's Almanac of Everyday Advice (Random House, 1995), editor Judson D. Hale, Sr. lists a number of money superstitions from various cultures. Some examples:

If you dream of oysters, then you will come into some money.

Swallowing a raw chicken heart will ensure you a financial
windfall.

A girl with hairy arms and legs will marry a rich man.

To increase your money, spit on the first piece of money you
receive each day.

I suggest we file these tidbits of advice in the "Ways to get money when all else has failed" folder. And it helps to remember that "getting" money is not an end in itself. Those who try simply to become as wealthy as possible have lost sight of what money is all about. After all, one can earn successfully and still not live successfully.

Do you want to live successfully? Then look at what you do with your money. Do you use your hard-earned resources to help others? Do you gladly support organizations and causes that serve humanity? Is the world a better place because of your possessions, no matter how limited you believe they may be?

Henry Van Dyke teaches, "There is a loftier ambition than merely to stand high in the world. It is to stoop down and lift mankind a little higher." Regardless of how much we possess, there is always someone we can raise up a bit higher. And in so doing, we find that we will stand taller, too.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

IMPERTURBABILITY IN LIFE

Decorative wooden helm steering wheel - “A community is like a ship; everyone ought to be prepared to take the helm.”

I think Charles Allen said it first. "When faced with problems which threaten to steal your peace of mind, learn the meaning of the word 'imperturbability.'"

I heard of two artists who were asked to illustrate peace. Each was assigned the task of depicting a peaceful scene on canvas.

The first artist drew a beautiful picture of a countryside on a warm, spring day. A soft sun illumines green grass and bathes a picturesque farmhouse and grazing cattle in its warmth. A farmer walks contentedly behind strong plow horses preparing his field for spring planting. The picture is one of beauty and quiet tranquility.

The other artist took a different approach. He drew a majestic, rugged cliff. Gnarled trees, twisted by years of violent winds, jut from the craggy mountainside. Dark clouds hang low and fierce while jagged streaks of lightening slash across an angry sky. The picture is one of violence, chaos and rage.

But as one looks closely, something else becomes visible. There in one of the crevices of the rocky mountain, tucked back just out of reach of the wind and rain - a nest with two small birds. Apparently unconcerned about the impending storm, they appear calm, cozy and peaceful as they patiently wait for the turbulence to pass.

And isn't that the way it so often is? We may want to be surrounded by peace, but storms rage. Problems and pressures without threaten to steal peace of mind within.

The answer is imperturbability: inner peace that doesn't leave when circumstances change. It's a peace that is greater than the problems of life, built on assurance that the tempest will finally pass, that we will survive the storm, that we may grow stronger because of it and, in the meantime, we will not endure it alone.

Imperturbability - it's the result of a peace that passes understanding. For serenity is not freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

PAY ATTENTION FOR LIFE!

Bustling crowd at the clearance sale - “Not just in commerce but in the world of ideas too our age is putting on a veritable clearance sale. Everything can be had so dirt cheap that one begins to wonder whether in the end anyone will want to make a bid.”

A funny story circulated recently about Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes. Doyle evidently told of a time when he hailed a taxi in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, "Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?"

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

"No, sir," the driver responded, "I have never seen you before." Then he explained: "This morning's paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always arrive. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle."

"This is truly amazing!" the writer exclaimed. "You are a real-life counterpart to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!"

"There is one other thing," the driver said.

"What is that?"

"Your name is on the front of your suitcase."

Perhaps the driver was no master detective, but he was observant! He paid attention, and paying attention is an important part of living fully.

"Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments," Rose FitzgeraldKennedy aptly said. A life lived to the full is lived from moment to moment, rather than from milestone to milestone. It is more of a series of days in which we truly pay attention, than a few major events along the way.

Speaker Alan Loy McGinnis tells of a New York City sculptor named Louise. She lived in one of the most dilapidated neighborhoods of the city. But, by paying attention to her surroundings, she found endless beauty and inspiration. She marveled at the elegance in the varying patterns of the sun and the moon reflected on tenement windows. In an object as ordinary as a chair she could see something extraordinary. "The chair isn't so hot," she once pointed out, "but look at its
shadow." By paying attention, she was able to see what others might miss.

Pay attention! To the things of life. To people. To events. To your senses. Even to the ordinary. Pay attention to the moments and your life will never lack beauty and splendor. By making the most of the moments, you make the most of the years.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

FOR CLOSENESS IN LIFE: T-R-A-V-E-L

White Eeepc netbook computer - “All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.”

Inmate Mitchell King had a visitor -- his wife. King was serving a six-year jail term in Auckland, New Zealand for armed robbery. But his wife didn't want to be away from him for that long. So they held hands. And they stuck. She'd rubbed her palms with Super Glue.

Their new-found closeness was short-lived. And their separation painful. Her technique is not one I'd recommend for a closer relationship.

But if you want more closeness; if you desire relationships that are deeper and broader, more meaningful and longer-lasting, then remember the word "travel."

T is for TRUST. Trust is the glue that holds people together (not Super Glue). A relationship will go nowhere without it.

R is for RESPECT. "Do not save your loving speeches for your friends till they are dead; do not write them on their tombstones, speak them rather now instead," writes Anna Cummins. It's about respecting others and letting them know that you value them.

A is for AFFECTION. Sometimes affection means love. Sometimes it means a touch. Always it means kindness.

V is for VULNERABILITY. Though we may feel afraid to let another too close, no relationship will go anywhere without risking vulnerability. Entrepreneur Jim Rohn says, "The walls we build around us to keep out the sadness also keep out the joy." And the love.

E is for EMOTIONAL INTIMACY. Learn to be open. Learn to communicate freely. What kinds of relationships you make are largely determined by how openly you have learned to communicate.

L is for LAUGHTER. Victor Borge got it right when he said, "Laughter is the shortest distance between two people." It's also the most enjoyable.

For relationships that can really go somewhere, just remember the word "travel." Then enjoy the trip!

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

THE ONLY ANSWER THAT REALLY MATTERS FOR LIFE

Visitor center by the lake - “At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.”

It's said that we begin to cut our wisdom teeth the moment we bite off more than we can chew. But do we ever feel as if we have enough wisdom? That we have arrived; that we are wise?

Jeff Hull writes about his great aunt, called Momma J. At 96, she was the last of her generation. As the family was gathered at her sister's funeral, a cousin remarked to Jeff that they were soon to be moving into the family's oldest generation. Jeff looked at his cousin and said plaintively, "But Mary, I don't feel like I know the answers yet."

After everyone had a good laugh, Mary turned to Momma J. and said, "When does that change, Momma?"

Momma J., from her wheelchair, smiled and said, "I don't know yet, dear."

Upon reflection, Jeff Hull asks this penetrating question: "How often do we let our own story about our limitations stop us from doing what we want to, what we are committed to, in life?" He is asking, "How often do we feel as if we have to know the answers before we can proceed, before we can follow our hearts, or before we can attempt something big?"

I like the wisdom of Sydney Harris. "Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time," he says, "It is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable."

You and I do not have all the answers yet. Truth is, we never will. But if we wait for all the answers, we will never move forward.

For no regrets, the only answer that matters is...take that next step. With courage, follow your heart's desire. The path ahead may be dark and hazy, for we can never see far into the future. But it is always clear enough to take one more step. And it's the way to a full and happy life.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

A MATTER OF CHARACTER IN LIFE

Huge seahorse statue - “Men go abroad to wonder at the heights of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motions of the stars, and they pass by themselves without wondering.”

In his autobiography Days of Grace (Random House Audio, 1993), tennis great Arthur Ashe relates a defining incident that occurred when he was 17 years old. He was playing in a tournament in West Virginia. As was often the case, he was the only contestant of color in the tournament.

One night, some of the kids trashed a cabin. They absolutely destroyed it and then decided to say that Arthur was responsible. The incident was reported in the newspapers; Arthur denied his involvement, but the boys would not change their story. The worst part for Arthur was worrying about what his father would say and do. He eventually made the dreaded phone call.

As he surmised, his father had already learned of the vandalism. His father's tone was grim. He asked Arthur only one question. "Arthur Junior," he asked, "all I want to know is...were you mixed up in that mess?"

Arthur answered, "No, Daddy, I wasn't." His father never asked about it again. Arthur learned that day why he had always been encouraged to tell the truth. There would come a time when he must be believed, and this was such a time. Because he had already earned his trust and respect, he knew his father believed him. From that day on he was determined, above all else, to live a life of integrity.

Unfortunately, we find notable examples of modern leaders in every field who give low priority to personal integrity. But we do not need saints - we need people like you. People who will be known for their integrity. People who will determine to be their best selves. People who daily earn the trust and respect of others, regardless of their age or station in life. People who insist on the importance of character.

Our world does not need another saint. But it needs you.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

KITCHEN AND DINING

Home is where the heart is. Ain't that the truth! Likewise, the kitchen is the heart of the home for some. Thus it is essential to have proper cooking tools and cooking equipments to complete your kitchen. There are a lot of choices available when it comes to selecting the right kitchenwares that suit your specific needs. But when it comes right down to it I always go to Shopwiki for its reliable kitchen and dining products buying guide.

Whether you are in the market for new pots and pans or kitchen appliances like cooktop grills and refrigerators, it is always a good idea to read their respective buying guides on Shopwiki's kitchen and dining products buying guide. In my personal experience, it has helped me make the right informed choice of getting the best reliable and affordable stand mixer for my mom as a mother's day gift. When my 5 year old microwave oven broke down, I got a Sharp R-1214 microwave oven as a replacement following its high rating on shopwiki. It has been nearly 8 years and my microwave is still going strong, all thanks to shopwiki's microwave oven guide.

WHEN YOU CAN'T HAVE WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE

Dining area by the lake - “I had rather be shut up in a very modest cottage with my books, my family and a few old friends, dining on simple bacon, and letting the world roll on as it liked, than to occupy the most splendid post, which any human power can give.”

We can't always have everything we want! One woman laments that she wants to be a bear. Actually, what she says is this:

"If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that, too.

If you're a bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. I could deal with that, too.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup. I wanna be a bear."

We can't always have everything we want! One person said this:

"As a rule, man's a fool. When it's hot he wants it cool.
When it's cool he wants it hot, always wanting what is not."

Our age is characterized by the ability to get what we want, and the inability to want what we've got. It is characterized by discontentment.

In 1988, one woman won twenty-two million dollars in her state lottery. Her family and friends are gathered around her. The television lights are blazing. Even the network news is there. She was ecstatic. "This," the woman proclaimed, "is the happiest day of my life!"

But a mere five years later found her looking sullen. She was shown again on television shaking her head in disbelief. In a matter of a few short years, she went through a divorce, the alienation of her children, and an investment that turned sour. A judge had now garnished her lottery winnings for life. The closing scene showed the woman sitting on the steps of an apartment building in utter despair. She had won $22 million, but it was not enough to save her from unhappiness.

You have the ability to get what you want. You probably have everything you need to be completely satisfied. Do you also have the ability to want what you've got? Do you have peace of mind?

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

THE BEST GIFT EVER FOR LIFE

Rocky road ahead - “He who chooses the beginning of the road chooses the place it leads to. It is the means that determines the end.”

Merrill Markoe once quipped, "It's like magic. When you live by yourself, all your annoying habits are gone!" But the bigger question is: Can you still have annoying habits and be accepted anyway?

Author Francine Klagsbrun asked a select group of successfully married couples the secrets of their happy marriages. Often they replied, "We don't expect perfection." Even though their spouses had qualities they would like to see changed, they had learned to accept those qualities because, as one woman said, "The payoff is so great in others areas."

Former president Jimmy Carter discovered a surprising benefit when he chose NOT to try to change his spouse. He once told how NOT criticizing Rosalynn actually enhanced his marriage (READER'S DIGEST, July 1989). This is what he said:

"Perhaps because of my Navy training, punctuality has been almost an obsession. Rosalynn has always been adequately punctual, except by my standards. A deviation of five minutes or less in our departure time would cause a bitter exchange.

"One morning I realized it was Rosalynn's birthday and I hadn't brought her a present. What could I do that would be special for her? I hurriedly wrote a note: 'Happy birthday! As proof of my love, I will never make an unpleasant comment about tardiness.' I signed it and delivered it in an envelope, with a kiss.

"More than four years later, I still keep my promise. It has turned out to be one of the nicest birthday presents for Rosalynn -- and for me."

His last sentence is telling. It turned out good for Rosalynn AND for him! The surprising benefit of accepting others without wishing that they were different is that you, too, will be happier.

What a wonderful present to give to somebody -- complete and unconditional acceptance! And its just too good a gift to wait for a birthday.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS EVER FOR LIFE

Bonzai potted plants for sale - “When planning for a year, plant corn. When planning for a decade, plant trees. When planning for life, train and educate people.”

We ALL fail!

And I'm not talking about your latest baking disaster or losing a game of "Scrabble." We fail in some important areas. We may fail at a significant relationship. We may fail at a job. We may fail at doing something we are convinced we were meant to do! We all fail. And sometimes we fail in pretty spectacular ways.

Baseball player Lou Brock said something important about failure. Brock once held the record for stolen bases. He was about 35 years old at the time and his days as a professional player were winding down. Brock was talking about why he successfully stole more bases than younger, faster players.

"When you start out in baseball," Brock said, "you're young and you have the speed and reflexes. However, when you try to steal second base and you get thrown out, it's a long walk back to the dugout with 40,000 fans watching you. When you reach my age, you come to understand that records are not set by being the quickest, but by the willingness to look bad in the eyes of others."

When Brock became willing to look bad in the eyes of 40,000 fans, he broke the chains of fear and experienced true freedom. (He probably also played better!) He learned how to do ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS EVER: he learned how to put failure behind him.

Unless we learn how to put failure behind us:

· We will never ask for what we need for fear of rejection.

· We will never ask a boss for a promotion for fear of her saying no.

· We will never go back and take classes for fear of failing.

· We will never change careers for fear of it not working out.

· We will never forgive others who hurt us for fear of being hurt by them again.

· We won't do the things we want to do for fear of letting ourselves and others down.

Unless we learn how to put failure behind us, we won't take any risk at all! And we'll never fully live, either.

The Bible talks about forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. Learn to put your failures behind you and you can go places you never dreamed possible.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

TELL TIME ON THEIR CLOCK IN LIFE

Precious golden crocodile statue - “Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is.”

"Find out what makes them tick, then tell time on their clock." This was one man's solution for getting along well with people. Find out what makes them tick - learn to understand them. Then tell time on their clock - identify with them and speak their language.

There is an old story which Mark Twain was said to have told first. It is about a Missouri farmer who ran five times for the state legislature without winning. It wasn't because he didn't practice his speeches. He rehearsed his campaign talks every day while milking. He referred to himself as "your humble aspirant." He referred to his audiences as "my enlightened constituents." He talked of "obtaining a mandate" for his "legislative mission."

Then one day even his cow balked at his speeches and kicked him in the teeth. With his front teeth knocked out, the farmer could speak only words of one syllable. The result was he won his next election and kept getting reelected.

However Twain felt about the electorate of his day, the story still sheds light on the importance of "telling time on their clock." A highly educated and eloquent politician may not relate to his/her constituency. Many hard working, plain folk appreciate straight talk in plain language. They distrust those who seem to "put on airs" and feel as if that candidate might just try to "put one over."

However, they can relate to one who speaks their language. This is a person who knows what makes them tick. This is someone who identifies with their plight and lets them know it.

The principle works well for non-politicians, too. If it is important to relate well to others, first learn what makes them tick. How well do you know that teenager in your life (or parent) or that client or even that supervisor? In this global community, how well do you know those of different backgrounds?

Then tell time on their clock. Let them know you understand. Speak their language. You may be amazed at the way others will respond!

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

LAUGHING -- IT'S JUST PLAIN FUN FOR LIFE

Oil palm byproducts on display - “Happiness is a byproduct of an effort to make someone else happy”

My friend Jack was in the hospital when the new pastor from his church arrived. He sent a message that he would like the pastor to call on him. Before the pastor came to the hospital, Jack ordered an extra catheter bag from the hospital pharmacy. Since he was a pharmacist in the hospital, he knew the staff well enough to make such a request. Then he filled the bag with his favorite pale soft drink --Mountain Dew.

The new pastor soon arrived and they visited for a while. At one point, Jack reached down and picked up the bag from the side of the bed. He studied it for a moment and then said, "It looks a little thin. Maybe I'll run it through again." And he drank from it.

After the new pastor recovered from shock, he laughed with his new friend. And he discovered through the years that Jack brought a valuable gift to life -- laughter.

"The most thoroughly wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed," said Nicholas de Chamfort. And another merry soul made this wise observation: "Ever notice how everyone who gets a flat tire can laugh about it a week or a month later? The shorter the distance between the flat and the laugh, the healthier the body, the keener the mind, the stronger the spirit."

Laugh quickly. Laugh heartily. Laugh often. Sure, it's good for your body, mind and spirit ... but mostly, it's just plain fun.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

DECIDING HOW TO LIVE IN LIFE

Trophies and awards on display - “The notion that the public accepts or rejects anything in modern art is merely romantic fiction. The game is completed and the trophies distributed long before the public knows what has happened.”

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"

He now works for a software company, writing error messages.

Those beautiful dreams we have for the rest of our lives too often don't materialize. And, again too often, we look back dissatisfied with the direction we took or the place we finally reached.

Frederick Buechner, in his book THE HUNGERING DARK (New York: Seabury Press, 1968), talks about looking back at high school yearbooks. He plays a sad game, remembering what all his classmates hoped and dreamed of becoming. "In my class, as in any class, at any school," he says, "there were students who had a real flair, a real talent, for something. Maybe it was for writing or acting or sports. Maybe it was an interest and a joy in working with people. Sometimes
it was just their capacity for being so alive that made you more alive to be with them. Yet now, a good many years later, I have the feeling that more than just a few of them are spending their lives at work in which none of these gifts is being used. This is the sadness of the game .."

Matt Lamb could have been one of those people. Until 1987, Matt owned and ran his own funeral home in Chicago. But that year, a doctor told Matt that he had a fatal disease. So he closed the funeral home and pursued his true passion, painting.

Soon, Matt's art drew national attention. He became quite successful. Only after Matt had found success in his dream career did doctors discover that they had misdiagnosed him. He wasn't going to die after all.

A misdiagnosis may have saved him from a life of meaninglessness. Not that owning one's own small business is in any way unworthy, but it simply was not Matt's true passion. In his heart, he wanted to paint, and he would never be truly happy until he pursued that dream, wherever it finally led him.

What does it take to move us to follow our passions? Must we face a crisis before we step off the safe, known path onto the unknown trail of adventure we've dreamed of following all our lives?

Singer Joan Baez reminds us: "You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live." That decision is too important to put off another day.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes

ACT ON IT IN LIFE

Stripped printer for repair - “Revise and revise and revise - the best thought will come after the printer has snatched away the copy”

A little bear cub was confused about how to walk. "What do I do first?" he asked his mother. "Do I start with my right foot or my left? Or both front feet and then my back feet? Or do I move both feet on one side and then both feet on the other?"

His mother answered, "Just quit thinking and start walking."

She was wise, for things will happen only after we put aside thinking and talking and start doing.

Nolan Bushnell, the founder of Atari, said that everyone who has ever taken a shower has an idea. It's the person who gets out of the shower, dries off and does something about it who makes a difference. Or, as columnist Sydney Harris puts it, "Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. " One of the most important lessons we can learn is to act on a good idea.

From Lifesupport.

Lifesigns Life Quotes